Whirlwind!!

So this past month has been such a whirlwind adventure!  In the beginning of the month I began thinking about homeschooling.  So that brought me to a whole months worth of researching, asking friends who homeschool questions, observing some friends styles and so on!

Our conclusion is that we will be homeschooling next year!!  I am so excited, nervous, anxious....!  After doing a TON of research on learning styles, teaching styles, homeschooling styles, I think we have it narrowed down to our final choices!  I am so amazed at the free resources that are out there.  I am finding tons of web sites, and books that offer lists of websites with free resources.

Although I am finding lots of free resources or nearly free online I still feel that a formal curriculum for Big E will be the best since he is used to being in school and does really well.  For Little N I am going to go for a more relaxed teaching and allowing him lots of free play along with the basic pre school knowledge stuff!  He is struggling with some little things like writing, coloring, tracing, mostly because he has never liked doing those things so we never made him.  So for Little N I am coming up with manipulative games for him to play, he will also be doing some writing workbooks, and basic coloring/following directions type of activities.

Little N with one of the games I found at Confessions of a Homeschooler!

In the beginning I was strongly leaning towards a formal curriculum for Little N, mostly because Big E would have one so why not.  Then the more we narrowed down and found what we would be using for Big E, I realized that we would be doing some subjects together so instead of wasting money on a curriculum that we would only use half of, why not just get a few workbooks for him to go through and use those.  Subjects that we will be doing together, hopefully, are Bible, Science and maybe History/Geography.

I am ready for this homeschool conference that is coming up in a few weeks, I am ready to actually see the stuff we have only been able to look at online!  I am such a planner that I am getting antsy not knowing for a positive what will be taking place next year!!  I know CRAZY!!  I think I am driving my dear hubby nuts!!

Here are all the books I have accumulated in the last month!  Most I found on Amazon, some at Goodwill!

We are also needing to buy a bookcase, and we are struggling to find a good quality one that doesn't cost a ton.  The one we found is at IKEA, and that is a 3 hour drive for us, plus we can't take our children with us or we wouldn't be able to get the bookcase home.  So then we need to find someone willing to watch our children for an entire day!  Hopefully over the summer we will find time to get up there.  In the meantime we are scouring second hand store, craigslist, and now garage sales are starting!! :)

1 Corinthians 13

Recently I was really encouraged by a blog post from Hearts At Home speaker Jill Savage.  She wrote a post that was 1 Corinthians 13 for Moms (the Love Chapter in the Bible).  This came from her blog and I am going to share it here:

1 Corinthians 13 for Moms:

I can read bedtime stories till the cow jumps over the moon and sing "Ten Little Monkeys" until I want to call the doctor-but if I don't have love, I'm as annoying as a ringing phone.

I can chase a naked toddler through the house while cooking dinner and listening to voice mail, I can fix the best cookies and Kool-Aid in the neighborhood, and I can tell a sick child's temperature with one touch of my finger, but if I don't have love, I am nothing.

Love is patient while watching and praying by the font window when it's 30 minutes past curfew.

Love is kinds when my teen says "I hate you!"

It does not envy the neighbors' swimming pool or their brand new mini van, but trusts the Lord to provide every need.

Love does not brag when other parents share their disappointments and insecurities, and love rejoices when other families succeed.

It doesn't boast, even when I've multi-tasked all day long and my husband can't do more than one thing at a time.

Love is not rude when my spouse innocently asks, "What have you done today?"

It does not immediately seek after glory when we see talent in our children, but encourages them to get training and make wise choices.

It is not easily angered, even when my 15 year old acts like the world revolves around her.

It does not delight in evil (is not self-righteous) when I remind my 17 year old that he's going 83 in a 55-mph zone, but rejoices in the truth.

Love does not give up hope.

It always protects our children's self-esteem and spirit, even while doling out discipline.

It always trusts God to protect our children when we cannot.  It always perseveres, through blue nail polish, burps and other bodily functions, rolled eyes and crossed arms, messy rooms and sleep overs.

Love never fails.

But where there are memories of thousands of diaper changes and painful labor(s), they will fade away.

Where there is talking back, it will (eventually) cease. (Please, Lord?)

Where these is a teenager who thinks she knows everything, there will one day be an adult who knows you did your best.

For we know we fail our children, and we pray they don't end up in therapy, but when we get to heaven, our imperfect parenting will disappear.  (Thank you, God!)

When we were children, we needed a parent to love and protect us.  Now that we're parents ourselves, we have a heavenly Father who adores, shelters us and holds us when we need to cry.

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love But the greatest of these is love.

~Author Unknown

I just thought this was so great to hear the practical side of never failing love!  Knowing that I will fail as a parent but I have a Heavenly Father who will NEVER fail me or my children and ALWAYS loves me and my children!!  Thank you Jesus for your unfailing love!!

Philippians 4:13, 19

I can do all things through him who strengthens me.  And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.

Psalm 139:5

You hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand upon me.

Failure....

Websters definition of failure is this: nonperformance of something due, required, or expected,  lack of success, deterioration or decay, especially of vigor, strength.  Man does that describe me today!  Here is a series of events that took place at my home just about 2 hours ago.

I awake after being able to sleep in a little, my husband had gotten up with the baby at about 5:30, so I could rest.  That was so sweet, and I was so grateful for the extra hour and a half to sleep in!  So I walk out of our bedroom to my little sweet N telling me he needed some milk!  My husband was busy with the baby, he had just finished his bottle and needed to be changed.  So with some asking my little sweet N, how he was supposed to ask for his milk, he finally said "please, may I have some milk".  Sure sweet little N, I would be happy to get it for you!  THEN.... while pouring him a cup of milk, into the cup that he had gotten out, I realized there was still a cup of milk in the refrigerator  so I get that cup out and discover that it just had a little bit left in it.  I decided that rather than waste the milk that was already in the refrigerator I would pour that remaining milk into his cup.  Well that did not sit well with him and he began throwing a fit.   Now here is where the failure on my part took place.  Instead of reacting calmly and rationally to the fit throwing, now hanging on my leg, sweet little N, I blew up!  I was so upset with the attitude he has been having lately, that I lost it!  I threw his milk into the refrigerator, grabbed him up and spanked his little bottom.  You would think that would have been enough for his sweet little heart.  BUT I continued to lose it and I took him down the hall and tossed him onto his bed, and went storming from his room slamming his door (which by the way, they get time outs for!).  Then I proceeded to my bedroom and slammed my door!  Oh boy is this really me!!!  

After spending 5 minutes cooling off in my room, leaving my poor husband (who was changing the baby and had no idea what was going on), to deal with this situation, I emerged!  Still not too calm but feeling like I needed to go and talk to my sweet little N.  Going into his room, where he was now standing in the middle of it, looking a little unsure of what just happened.  I walk up to him and get down to his level and have to apologize for yelling at him and getting upset like I did. Now if you have never had to apologize to your kids, then you have no idea how humble it makes you!  After apologizing and grab him onto my lap and cuddle his little heart out.  BUT I can tell that he is still not sure what to think of this whole situation.  After holding him for a few minutes he decided he's done and gets up to join his brother watching Saturday morning cartoons in the living room.  All this to say that I feel like a total failure today, and I now that only by the grace of my loving Heavenly Father will I be forgiven!!  

This message of a loving Heavenly Father is so important to me that I always feel terrible when I lose my temper with my children, because I am supposed to be the example for them to go by!!  I am supposed to be who they can trust in this world!!  BUT I also know that my Heavenly Father is a powerful, forgiving, and loving God who is more wonderful that I can ever express to my children.  I lay them into his hands daily, for their protection and their faith!!  I am so blessed to know that nothing I can do will bring them to His loving Hands its only by His divine power that any of us are called to HIM!!  Thank you Jesus for bridging that gap for us, so that we can come to God's loving hand and sit with Him in Heaven one day!!  

2 Thessalonians 1:11, 12

...that our God may make you worthy of his calling and may fulfill every resolve for good and every work of faith by his power, so that the name of our Lord Jesus may be glorified in you, and you in him, according to the grace of our God and the Lord Jesus Christ.